Tag Archives: opinion

Serenity Before It Shatters.

current events, essay, opinion, , , , , , , ,

The morning began with a heavy fog hanging in the field behind The Oasis at Four Queen Palms.  The air was quiet; not even the mockingbirds’ trills broke the tranquility.  No grinding, mechanical vehicle sounds came from the faraway road that buttresses the neighborhood.  It was a perfectly peaceful morning.

By noon, the fog dissipated.  Life stirred.  The birds chirped.  A brown squirrel ran across the porch screen.  Vehicle sounds could be now heard in the distance.

But it was in those early morning hours when this domain was covered in the thick fog that the world felt serene and at peace.

Life has always been uncertain.  No one can predict with sureness how his life will turn out, what the future will bring, how the cycle of life will progress.  We can only look ahead with hope and optimism.  We can plan all we want, but there are those factors that seem to insist on inserting themselves into our plans.

Our future is now filled with even more uncertainty as war drums are banging with a consistent cadence now.

The trouble is, real war is not as glamorous as the jingoes, belligerents, aggressors, politicians – call them what you will – enjoy portraying.  It will be miraculous if we dodge a hot state of war.

I’d rather the fog I see across the field at The Oasis not be from gunfire . . . .

As ever,

Lady Susan Marie Molloy

✿●▬▬▬●✿ ©2023 The Oasis at Four Queen Palms ✿●▬▬▬●✿ 

Some Things I Miss – In the Restaurant Realm

essay, opinion, tips for gracious living, , , , , ,

The other day, as Best Friend and I were eating at a local restaurant, I looked at my place setting:

Plastic plate, thin paper napkin, and lousy metal utensils.

These days, dining out is nothing to write home about insofar as the presentation of meals.  Even the waitstaff don’t wear nice uniforms anymore.  They look like slobs that just rolled in off the street after getting out of bed in a hurry.

Then I remembered dining in the Olden Days:

Chinaware, linen napkins, glassware, and real silverware.

Not so long ago, restaurant tables were set with cloth tablecloths and cloth napkins (or at least top quality, thick paper napkins).  The restaurants’ silverware was real – heavy, substantial, with sharp fork tines, and knife blades that could actually cut meat.  Some of the better restaurants even had their name engraved or embossed on all the utensils.  The china was anything but cheesy.  The glassware was real glass, not plastic made to look like glass.  The waiters and waitresses dressed nicely in uniforms.  Busboys – well, they were a standard, too.  And the waitstaff would stop by every so often to ask how everything was.  If you had leftovers, your meal was wrapped in tinfoil and placed in a cheerfully printed doggie bag – a picture of a happy dog looking forward to the meal inside.  Some restaurants even fashioned your leftovers in a tinfoil swan shape.

Nowadays, we get forks that can’t stab butter, knives that have no sharp cutting edge nor serrated edge, spoons with near-flat bowls that couldn’t hold an eighth of ounce of anything.  All the utensils of today are made with cheap, cheesy, thin stainless steel from China.  Drinkware is mostly plastic made to look like glass – Surprise!  Surprise!  The waitstaff are sloppy in their garb, with jeans and a T-shirt with the restaurant’s name printed on them.  They come by your table asking, “How’s it tastin’?” (I hear that more and more now), and it’s rare to see a busboy.  And your leftovers are no longer wrapped in tinfoil.  You get to take them home in a Styrofoam box that drips.

These are my general observations.  There are a few places where the tables are set with linen tablecloths today, and the place settings are top shelf.  But they are few and far between.  And to be more clear, I’m not talking about fast food places, like the national hamburger joints.  It’s expected to find paper napkins and plasticware there.  What I’m referring to are the sit-down restaurants that have more than not degenerated into shoddiness.  *Sigh.*

At home, I try my best to always have a pretty table set with our Fiestaware, our good silverware, and good quality napkins.

Well, at least somewhere, Best Friend and I have a place to eat where the experience is always classy.

If you want it done right, do it yourself.

As ever,

Lady Susan Marie Molloy

✿●▬▬▬●✿ ©2023 The Oasis at Four Queen Palms ✿●▬▬▬●✿

A DINING ROOM 2

A Cup of Reality.

essay, etiquette, manners, opinion, transparency, , , , , , , ,

The other morning, Best Friend returned to the house to pour a cup of coffee.  While doing so, he quipped, “You can’t pour a cup of black coffee into a black cup wearing dark sunglasses.”

You see, he was doing just that, and it was nearly a disaster on the countertop.  The black coffee streaming into the black cup whilst he was still wearing his dark sunglasses made it impossible for him to gauge the progress of his task.  Thus, it almost developed into a disaster, yet he averted it only when he abruptly realized he could not see how much coffee he was pouring into the cup.  He snappily removed his sunglasses, and he finished his task at hand, unencumbered.  Disaster averted.

Life itself is much like that.  When we allow the shadows of denial, lip service, gaslighting, obliviousness, or what have you, to throw a penumbra over the clear reality of our lives, we remain in the dark and suffer for it, whether we consciously realize it or not.  Many of us will go through our lives not realizing what is stopping us from doing something we need/should/must do.  Some of us will walk along life’s path, going only so far as to see some perceived victimization and stop right there on that corner, to wail and moan about it.  Then there are those of us who see what our roadblocks are and do something about them and then move on with our lives.

Admittedly, I sometimes don’t see the shadows that are negatively affecting my life.  In fact, I might just go merrily along, believing and accepting that the excuses given to me ad infinitum are legitimate.  Now, I am a realist here.  Some of the excuses – or shall I say, some of the reasons – are legitimate, and everything falls into place eventually.  But when I hear excuses or gaslighting thrown in my direction with never a real effort made to make good on the promised matter, I chalk it up to that person not having the backbone to be forthright about not delivering on said promised matter.  It might be a cry for attention on their part, or lack of backbone.  I’m not here to psychoanalyze them.  No one can do that, in fact.  (That’s an essay for another time.)

To make my point clearer, let’s take a jaunt down Memory Lane.  When I was in my early 20s, I had a date with a guy.  He and I went to a co-worker’s home for a Christmas dinner and an evening of playing bridge, as did everyone else in our small divisional office within our governmental organization.  (For reference and a fun fact, he worked in the Logistics Division, and I worked in the Management Systems Division.)  There were eight couples at the co-worker’s home.  We had a nice time mingling, and we both had pleasant conversations in his car both to and from the party.  He promised to call me for another date.  And promised.  Yet, he never did.  While I had hoped he would call, by his fourth promise, I didn’t care anymore.  I eventually figured that he didn’t have the backbone to say nothing about the matter, let alone call me.  It would have been better to come out and say he wouldn’t call, than to string me along.  As nice of a guy he was, in the long run he would not be a good partner, let alone a platonic friend, because of his lack of straightforward communication.  Good heavens!

There are the people who promise to call, but never do, even after you call them every so often.  It reminds me of the television commercial I saw a long while back:  “Nobody’s calling you!”

Well, isn’t that the truth!

It is much like a neighbor we had who consistently promised to get together, but his promises were never fulfilled.  I chalked that up to him liking to hear himself talk – the “It’s the Thought that Counts” blueprint of virtual-signaling.

Over the years, events such as those eventually taught me to look at life behind the shadows of deceit.  Call me cynical, call me skeptical, call me jaded.  Life events taught me to believe when I see action – at least with repeat offenders.

Sometimes it is difficult for me to understand why people gaslight or completely throw a shadow on a situation.  Unfortunately, I have seen more and more of it recently – at least more so over these past three years.  It almost appears that too many people have become lazy, or dare I say it?  Uncaring, indifferent, and cold.  Throw darkness on it; I meant well; no one will notice seems to be the mantra.

Perhaps I live in a different world – a world where manners, graciousness, and straightforwardness exist and actually matter.  That is my world.  So now, I don’t bother with people whom I don’t hear from anymore.  I see things for what they are.  I see people for who they are.

It would be a better world and people would get along beat when the cloak of darkness is lifted.   Why not be forthright and honest and transparent?

Don’t pour black coffee into a black cup whilst wearing dark sunglasses.

I’m not drinking from it.

As ever,

Lady Susan Marie Molloy

✿●▬▬●✿ ©2023 The Oasis at Four Queen Palms ✿●▬▬●✿