As Irving Berlin wrote in his song, “Count Your Blessing (Instead of Sheep),” written for the 1954 movie, White Christmas:

When I’m worried and I can’t sleep

I count my blessings instead of sheep

And I fall asleep counting my blessings.

When my bankroll is getting small

I think of when I had none at all

And I fall asleep counting my blessings.

There is so much from which to learn, for those 43 words give much food for thought.  Even I sometimes fall into the doldrums from time to time, particularly when events and people from outside the walls of The Oasis at Four Queen Palms to enter and upset the pacific atmosphere here.  I know that they do not deserve that power, and for the most part, I don’t let their silly nonsense infiltrate.  Yet, it isn’t a 100 per cent stoppable guarantee.  Life happens; it’s how I handle the garbage that counts.  With that said, I discovered a 1913 book by Fannie Dickerson Chase, Good Form and Social Ethics, which also puts forth a cornucopia of points for us that are well worth the time to ponder.  Here, I will share some of what she wrote:

Do not be a slave to other people’s opinions.  As I see it, don’t be a willow tree in the breeze, bending this way and that, taking other people’s opinions as your own.  Don’t fall into the “your opinion is my opinion” mantra.  Gosh.  To me, and to others, that means you have no thoughts of your own, and we mind as well just be talking to ourselves.

Be quick to forgive.  If we are still marinating in something we think another person did to us years ago, let it go, for Pete’s sake!  Learn from what happened and stop wallowing in it.

Magnify your joys.  The world is, and always will be, filled with grief and ordeals, but it is also filled with good and rewards.  To alleviate one’s own bitterness is to remember that other people are experiencing even heavier trials and emotions.

Hear accurately and speak accurately.  No one likes to hear misinformation, nor gossip.

Do not be a servant to your moods.  By the same token, don’t drag others into your moodiness.  Stop feeling sorry for yourself.  It is not productive, nor becoming.

Do the right thing.  Be honorable, keep your promises regardless of how you might feel towards the person to whom you made that promise.

Be slow to discredit another’s word or action.  It is best to believe in others until you find absolute substantiation to not believe in them. 

Do not be soured and worried by disappointments.  Take your disappointments gracefully, for they have been given to you for a greater purpose.

Do not be thoughtless.  Lapses of courtesy does not bode well.

Be truthful.  If you fib your way through life, one day, people will – and they do! – eventually discover that you’ve been a fraudster.

Be sympathetic.  You may not really know the true story about the other person.

These, and the many other points that are made in the book, are words to live by throughout the year.  I bring this topic up now during the holiday season to point out that this time of year should be more joyful, more calming, and more twinkling than ever.  Yes, the world seems to be careening towards the Dark Side more and more each day, yet we need to maintain the sanity, happiness, joy, and true good in ourselves despite the ugliness.  Don’t let the Devil overtake your life.

Make your holiday season classy.

As ever,

Lady Susan Marie Molloy

©2022 The Oasis at Four Queen Palms 

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